Radha's story is a first-hand account of abuse at the hands of Swami Muktananda.  Joan Radha Bridges posted this story on the exSY chat group, which can be accessed by pointing your browser to http://www.yahoogroups.com/groups/exsy.   Other messages from members of the exSY Yahoogroup are included, as well as an official response to Radha's story from Lester Strong of the SYDA Foundation.

NOTE: AN UPDATE (12/2009) APPEARS DIRECTLY AFTER RADHA'S STORY

Post Number 1679


From: "radha30327" <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Mon Sep 30, 2002 11:47 am
Subject: My Story


Hello everyone, I have lurked around these parts a long
time,but only recently have I come to understand the full impact of
the experience I had w/ Muktanada. I am compelled not only by all
the support I have received by pouring through the LSY Archives and
the website, but recently the sycronicity of the letters on this
active group and my experience have been amazing.


I am one of the girls that Baba had sex with in his room on the
now infamous table, at Shree Muktananda Ashram. I was 26 years old
at the time this happenened; Baba was about 73. This year, I turned
50. I have spent a lot of the past year coming to terms with what
happened to me when I was just 26 years old, so long ago.( You must
realize,for me there was no choice,I considered him God incarnate,I
would have jumped in front of a trunk if he told me to at that
time. ) And, for all the years in between, I have struggled with the
meaning of my experience: was it a great tantric blessing, was it
not a blessing at all, why am I so confused? I searched books for
answers, left SY, I came back to SY, I left again, and on and on.
The truth is, I was stuck in the past, frozen in that room in my
26th year, trying to make sense of it all since then.


This year, I finally began to share the "big secret" (I was told
not to tell,and really felt quite paralazed by my situation with no
one to talk to, but always blamed myself for not being able to see
the truth) w/several people who understood and had profound
understanding and knowledge of Tantra. I shared my experience with
an incredible therapist who has lived in buddist ashrams in the past
and understands true tantra . She told me that Baba's actions were
not true tantra (true trantra elevates participates to a new level
of enlightenment). After asking me all the details about the rituals
Baba used, this therapist then asked me one last question that was
immensely powerful for me: " Knowing what you have been
through,would you now take your 10 year old daughter by the hand and
send her through that door to have the same experience that you
had?" Of course I said, "No!". My therapist said without
hesitation, "This was abuse". (She was ingenious with that
question). I burst into tears, I was so relieved to finally "know"
the truth. This was just about a month ago, so, as you can imagine,
it has taken some time to just be able to share this, but I am
slowly sharing with close friends of mine in SY. It is a real
explosion in the life of anyone in SY, to realize the truth of what
Baba did. But I really feel that I owe this to all out there who are
seeking the truth.
>
> This year, as I said before, has been a breakthrough time. For
years I have stared at the LSY website, wondering what the truth
was, but denial is an amazing thing. We use it to protect ourselves.
I have a far richer inner life now than ever before. This past
March, by amazing circumstances, I found myself in India at the Tomb
of the Kalki Avatar. Simple, alone, powerful. This place "erased"
me" with white light - I feel new. It was there I first came to
understand that Muktananda, though a powerful Siddha, was not a"
perfect master". I understand what that means now. It has been 6
months of my mind reformating the software that was erased and
following the inner guide to discover "who I am" and what my true
destiny is. I am very grateful to be where I am today. It has not
been easy, nor would I trade for anything this convoluted path God
is sending me on - there is no other path in this universe worth
treading.

They say when we turn 50, Chiron (astrological, wounded healer )
returns to it's natal position and we learn the truth of our own
wounds. And, if we heal our wounds, we, in compassion, learn from
those very wounds how to reach out to others, to help them heal
their wounds. This is my hope for all of us - that compassion and
love be our path. And, as we all as we so idealisticlly approached
SY, that we are able to find the inner path that is the only" true"
way and light that way for each other. Blessings and many thank yous
to you all,


Radha

Post Number 2795

From: "Joan Bridges" <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Thu Jan 23, 2003 4:40 am
Subject: My Story,cont.


Dear List,
>
> I would like to say hello again, after being quiet and not posting on the
> list for the past few months. For those of you who may be new to the list
> since I last posted, I am Joan Radha Bridges. I am one of the females
with
> whom Muktananda had sex. I told my story on this list, and now, here is
the
> rest of the story, with the details that have been missing. I have also
sent
> a copy to the SYDA foundation.
>
> I am sorry to have been quiet these past months since I first posted. I
> have kept up with the reading of your posts. This is a great group, and I
> feel safe knowing you all are here with me in this uncharted revelation.
>
> I have been quiet because right after I first shared "MyStory" on-line, it
> was immediately cut and pasted, and sent to GM, along with a strongly
worded
> letter. From there, one thing led to another. Siddha Yoga figured out who
I
> was (not that I really care now, as I am glad to reveal who I am, as it is
> much cleaner this way and no one can say it is a story which has been made
> up). The long and short of it was, Siddha Yoga sent a women down (from
the
> foundation) unannounced, to try to make contact with me and "talk" to me,
> where I live. As if to add to the inappropriateness of this unscheduled
and
> unannounced attempted visit, on that particular day, it was also my
husband'
> s birthday. Of course I did 'not' receive her and I told her I was not
> interested.
>
> I also discovered that this unscheduled visit was a major inconvenience
for
> some of my old friends that were still involved w/the local Siddha Yoga
> center. They were expected to drop everything and pick this representative
> of the foundation up at the airport, drive her around, and house and feed
> her. It was just plain rude and most inappropriate!
>
> I have been working on my story, and waiting on the universe to show me
the
> time to finally reveal the truth about Muktananda's sexual affairs with
me.
> Today is the day for this to happen.
>
> Much Love to all of you, Joan Radha Bridges
> >
>

MY STORY





The Dalai Lama advises seekers to check a teacher's qualifications
carefully: "The best thing is" the Dalai Lama said in an interview last
February, "whenever exploitation, sexual abuse or money abuse happen, make
them public."

It is time for me to bring the light of truth to facts that have
been buried too long.

I was on Muktananda's staff for 8 years, beginning in 1974. I
was 21 years old when I joined the tour. The events that I am going to
recount occurred after about 5 years on tour with Baba. So I was around 26;
Muktananda was around 73.

The tour stopped In Miami where I went in advance to set up the
bookstore. I was surprised to find that I had been put in a room on the
top floor near Muktananda's penthouse quarters

All the young girls were in the rooms closest to Muktananda and
the older girls were further away. We would meditate in our rooms every
morning and listen to Muktananda walking up and down the hall. I personally
witnessed young girls coming and going from Muktananda's quarters.

A few months into our stay I was alone in my room when
Muktananda came in, closed the door and grabbed me and gave me a big kiss on
the mouth. I was both thrilled and confused - I didn't know what to think.

Shortly after, I was given an invitation by Malti to come to the Boston
Ashram with a small entourage. This was a privilege - I was thrilled to be
included.

In Boston, Baba would roam the halls at night. I would run into
him in the dark on the way to the bathroom. He continued to hug and kiss
me. I didn't understand, but told myself that Baba was God, so it must be
very special; it must be a good thing.

On return to South Fallsburg, I was back at my usual bookstore
seva without any special privileges or contact with Muktananda.

Then one evening I was returning from the bookstore with my cash
box. That day, I had prayed to Muktananda to help me understand my true
path - whether I was meant to have children or become a Swami. Muktananda
appeared in the lobby and pulled me behind a long curtain in front of his
house door. The curtain ran the length of the lobby and had holes in it
that people said had been made at Muktananda's request. The holes allowed
Muktananda to watch people without them knowing.

When he got me back there, he began to speak to me, mostly Hindi
with some English short phrases, "Chota, chota" which means something like
"little ones", as he pointed to my stomach. I was happy with this
direction.

Then he shocked and startled me: he grabbed my breasts and
twisted them tightly and reached under my dress and felt my vagina. I didn'
t know what to think or do - I was stunned. He sent me away with my head
spinning about how to explain to myself the Guru's actions. After all, this
was the Guru, the same as God, so why was he doing this? He told us to be
celibate, so how could this be sexual? I had no answers.


The following night again he appeared and motioned me to come.
I again did not question his directions since I was surrendered to
Muktananda as my Guru (surrender to the Guru was a principal part of the
Siddha Yoga chants and teachings that I ascribed to).

Muktananda took me back to his quarters this night and had me
lay down on a large ottoman. This time he inspected my vagina. He said
"Good yoni."

Muktananda brought me to his quarters again the next night. All
the while he told me "Don't tell anyone" and "Don't tell your husband."
Muktananda put me on a high table, pulled my legs back to expose my vagina
and pulled out his flaccid penis. He placed his penis as far up inside me
as he could and remained in that position a very long time.


During this time he said phrases such as "Baba urevetta" (semen
goes upward); "Baba Yogi". He kept repeating, "No sex, tantra", No sex,
tantra", "long time". ( " he seemed to be telling me he did this tantra a
long time,although I wondered what was so special about just standing there
a long time)

I felt he was trying to convince me and coerce to believe that
this was not sex. I felt doubt and distress that I have buried for many
years. I had to keep telling myself that, of course, Baba is doing the
right thing, he is God. I must be very special and important. I decided I
should be loyal to Baba. And so for all these years I have kept this
secret. I have stayed quiet, confused and silent.

Now I am 50 years old and ready to face and share the truth of my experience
with Muktananda. I want to be finally released from these events so that I
can move forward with my life without the burden of them.

In 1986, I tried to talk about my experience with people I
thought might help me understand it. One woman and I acknowledged our
mutual experience but she was not able to fully talk about it. I also
bought books on tantra and read articles. But I couldn't find anything that
described anything resembling my experience with Muktananda (in fact, I
learned that true tantra is something entirely different from what I
experienced).

In 1994, long after Muktananda died, I shared my experience with
a close friend who had guessed the truth of it. Shortly after I did that,
an old friend that I did seva with, now Gurumayi's assistant, called me at
my home in Atlanta. She interrogated me on what I said to my friend about
the experience and had me give her a detailed account. This was
embarrassing, but I felt I was going to finally get to talk about it with
someone close to Gurumayi. When I finished, she scolded me saying "Didn't
Baba always tell you 'top secret?'" That was the end of the conversation-
no help, no explanation, just the strong message to keep quiet.

In 2001, I planned a pilgrimage to India. (this was an intervention by the Divine,but this is another story) Before leaving, I
made a bold attempt to communicate with Gurumayi about my experience with
Baba by writing her a long heartfelt letter. It took weeks to compose,
telling her about my trip and asking about my experience with Muktananda,
hoping for some communication in return. I was clearly asking for help. I
sent the letter through one of Gurumayi's close assistants whom I knew well
and included a large check. I never heard anything from Gurumayi or anyone
else. My check was cashed.

Finally, at age 50, through my own exploration, experience and
insight, I can no longer deny that what happened to me with Baba was wrong.
This understanding was heightened through my therapy with a gifted
professional who is profoundly spiritual both in practice and training. I
finally got the courage to share what had happened to me with her. After I
described all of Baba's actions, she asked me whether, knowing what I have
been through, I would take my daughter by the hand and send her through the
door to experience the same thing. The answer was emphatically no -
absolutely not. At that moment, I clearly understood that Baba had sexually
abused me.

I am immensely grateful for the clarity that I have finally
received, after so many years of denial, confusion and heartache. It has
been important for me to acknowledge this abuse and move on. This has been
the healing process, but I know that there are many others that are younger
than I who have not been able to look at what happened to them. My hope is
that by telling my story and finally lifting the veil of secrecy that
others, too, may find the way to heal and move on with their lives. For
this reason I no longer remain anonymous. Because of fear, no one before
has put a name to their story of sexual abuse by Swami Muktananda. But I
will so that it can no longer be said these are made up stories. I invite
comments and questions and will try to answer and help anyone that needs it.
I also invite anyone that needs to talk off site to e-mail me privately.



Thank you. May we all find the Truth that we seek. God Bless.



Joan Radha Bridges

Post Number 2800

 

UPDATE 12/2009

Dear All,
I heard a funny/sad one today an old friend
saw Swami Lalita(ananda) who is now married. The SY escape clause for Swami's, what a laugh. As Muk said the first time a SY Swami left t get married, he said I never told everyone there is an escape clause.

He asked her how she reconciled what happened to Radha in the course of conversation. She said "oh I talked to Radha, she told me she liked it," LOL!!
Here's the kicker and the funniest part, I
was on tour with Lalita forever, I never spoke 2 words to her!! So how's that for the party line ,ha ha. And even if someone was deluded enough to say that, does it make it right for MUk or anyone to rape a brainwashed devoteee, can you say Stockholm syndrome? By the time most of had been doing the Guru Gita for years, there was no escape.

I struggled for years with was it a good thing? Was it an initiation (with my mind split off in PTSD compartments just to cope with Muk doing what he did, but this one is truly hilarious.) I NEVER talked to Lalita about this??
We never talked about anything!!! And would welcome her getting in touch with me personally!! !

Don't ya love the SY party line?? Not sure how much this works in SY's favor, they are admitting that it happened!!! But it's ok, if the rapee liked it. A 73 year old man with his penis in young girls while preaching celibacy ? Anyone that has read my story knows how incredibly conflicted I was. I had no choice in my mind.

My friend said to me there is a question. Is gossip or murder more harmful. I really had to think about this. What do you mean I asked??

He told me this concept of killing the spirit has been raging for 3500 years, it is from the Talmud. Most Rabbis he said believe gossip is worst.

Well murder kills the body, Gossip kills the spirit. How does a rape victim feel struggling with what happened ,then hearing false stories, made up to finish off the spirit???

How must all these young girls feel that STILL haven't been able to speak , are still silenced. Frozen in time.

The hypocrisy of SY and it's brainwashed followers is disgusting.

Still I am asking , where is the place for these girls to heal? All those who are complicit in your excuses with the crimes of the soul in SY, while you live your limited,isolated, protected, 2 dimensional lives, unable to ever think for yourselves.
Love, Rad



 

RETURN TO INITIAL RESPONSES TO RADHA'S ORIGINAL POST:

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
 

Date: Thu Jan 23, 2003 6:29 am
Subject: Re: [eXSY] My story, continued





Dear Shanti,Your words of encouragment,ring true to
what I feel these days. I feel truly blessed ,and
protected from w/in and w/out,w/ those of you like
yourself supporting me in that unseen realm. Thank-you
Also thank-you for asking about my health,yes so
many things are clearing,body ,mind ,and spirit.Things
are clear ,that I live in the present in a way I have
not been able to until now.
Thank-you,Love to you,Radha









--- "lokashantih <lokashantih@neetscape.net>"
<lokashantih@netscape.net> wrote:
> Dear Radha,
>
> I was grazing through my email and the messages one
> by one and
> replying to them. So there is my banality following
> your very
> profound message.
>
> You have show us what courage is. Thank you.
>
> You have also shown that Siddha Yoga is still trying
> to cover up
> truth, much as the Catholic Church.The corruption
> continues.Your
> experience of harassment by Siddha Foundation when
> exposing their
> dark side corresponds with my own. But you did get a
> bigger Muckamuck
> to harass you than I did.
>
> You have also shown us the truth of what the Dalai
> Lama has said and
> the Biblical injuction,"And the truth will set you
> free."
>
> I think that this is what is meant by worshipping
> your Self. Your own
> higher Self and not giving your power to Baba,
> Gurumayi or those who
> seek to intimidate you.
>
> I have found again and again that dharma protects
> the protector of
> dharma. Know that you are protected.
>
> Just out of curiosity, have your physical pains and
> illnesses
> decreased now?
>
> Know that you are protected, know that you are
> blessed. Know that you
> are loved and we deeply appreciate what you are
> doing and have done.
>
> Shanti
>
>
Post Number 2823


From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Fri Jan 24, 2003 2:21 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY] My Story,cont.



--- Adriana Breidenstein <adriana@jouurneysu.com>
wrote:
> Dear Radha -
>
> I too will find my response banal although my heart
> has been crying since your post.
> This is really a crime of the soul.
> By now I have read your letter many times.
>
Radha; Yes many souls ,many crimes

A:
> First of all - you shared your letter with us on
> this board. Can your letter/experience be shared
> outside this board?
>
> " I have been quiet because right after I first
> shared "MyStory" on-line, it
> > was immediately cut and pasted, and sent to GM,
> along with a strongly
> worded
> > letter. >From there, one thing led to another.
> Siddha Yoga figured out who -"
>
> How do you know this? Somebody actually told you who
> and what?
> Of course we do know that this board has plants - it
> must be one of the "Very Special Secret Seva's " .
>

R:
Your comments are timely and they offer me the
opportunity to address this,
as these actions affected me, my family and friends.

Someone I know saw this strongly worded letter that
was sent to GM, with my
story attached to it. The letter was of the definite
tenor of someone who
had left SY, and was not still in SY. As I understand
that strong emotions
may accompany this story and subject matter, I ask
everyone who may be
tempted to enlist such a plan of copying and pasting,
and such a strongly
worded letter, to PLEASE consider it puts me in the
middle of a potential
conflict playing itself out in a fashion that may not
be of my choosing. I
am a real person here, and I do not wish for myself,
my family or friends,
to be caught in a whirlwind of events triggered by
events of which I have no
knowledge, have not given my permission, nor are of my
inclination.

This material is breaking new ground, and I am
discovering much of it as I
travel this road. I sincerely ask for everyone's
support in this regard.
As far as sharing w/ someone you know to help them to
understand,this is of course a good thing if done w/
compassion,and healing in mind

A:

> " The long and short of it was, Siddha Yoga sent a
> women down (from
> the
> > foundation) unannounced, to try to make contact
> with me and "talk" to me,"
>
> To say what?
>

R:
She told me she wanted to talk to me about what
happened,she also wanted to speak to the friends that
I had told my story too,none of us spoke to her it was
very obvious that this smacked of damage control.I had
already found out from center friends that one of the
steering commitee from here was pulled out of a silent
retreat and questioned about me.This poor soul had
never even heard to sexual allegations and MU,she was
very upset,by the time this women was through,many
people at the center knew aboutmy first post, only
bits and pieces,but it was a much bigger mess than my
simple post could ever have made.




> "I also discovered that this unscheduled visit was a
> major inconvenience
> for
> > some of my old friends that were still involved
> w/the local Siddha Yoga
> > center. They were expected to drop everything and
> pick this representative
> > of the foundation up at the airport, drive her
> around, and house and feed
> > her. It was just plain rude and most
> inappropriate!"
> A:
> Did they tell these Sevites the real purpose of this
> mission?
> Sounds like lying and false pretense and INTEND -
> the SY word - what was the INTENTION?
>

R:
It was false pretense for sure,it pushed the women
involved over the edge they were tittering on,they are
out of SY now.Those involved were pretty put off by
the whole mess.


>
> The tour stopped In Miami where I went in advance to
> set up the
> bookstore. I was surprised to find that I had been
> put in a room on the
> top floor near Muktananda's penthouse quarters
> A:
> Same as above - Premeditated intent - (for possible
> sexual predation) same with subsequent
> invitations.
> R:
Yes


A:

> "The curtain ran the length of the lobby and had
> holes in it
> that people said had been made at Muktananda's
> request. The holes allowed
> Muktananda to watch people without them knowing."
>
> I see why "Intent" is such a buzzword in SY now.
> As for the "holy" curtain - It probably has been cut
> up between all the holes and sold off in tiny
> squares for devotees home pujas for a large sum of
> money. -
> R;
Really,thats a good one: )



> "Muktananda brought me to his quarters again the
> next night. All
> the while he told me "Don't tell anyone" and "Don't
> tell your husband." "
> A;
> Radha - Are you telling me that you were married,
> had a husband and you were told not to tell your
> husband?
> This is the most unbelievable damaging part of the
> whole sorry episode to me.
> Did they ever hear of "Thou shalt not even covet thy
> neighbor's wife."
> Certainly that part alone is not Tantric or Godly or
> Elevating or Trusting or Mystical!
>

R:
yes again,it was a dark act.

A:

> I don't even want to comment on the "good yoni." -
> There are soooooo many implications in those two
> words alone -
> I hope somebody will archive your post in a way
> where other people can find the real exsperience
> behind these words.
>

Rad:
It is something I have now studied all these years.
There are certain factors ,in black left-handed tantra
to us a certain kind of woman,to take energy,etc. As
far as archives There is a folder w/ my story in exsy.



> "In 1994, long after Muktananda died, I shared my
> experience with
> a close friend who had guessed the truth of it.
> Shortly after I did that,
> an old friend that I did seva with, now Gurumayi's
> assistant, called me at
> my home in Atlanta. She interrogated me on what I
> said to my friend about
> the experience and had me give her a detailed
> account. This was
> embarrassing, but I felt I was going to finally get
> to talk about it with
> someone close to Gurumayi. When I finished, she
> scolded me saying "Didn't
> Baba always tell you 'top secret?'" That was the
> end of the conversation-"
> A;
> Insult to Injury. Especially hard from another
> woman.
>
R;
I was very shut down by all this,people that don't
even know what has happened to me ,now that I am out
of this silence tell me they have never seen me so
present.


> "I
> made a bold attempt to communicate with Gurumayi
> about my experience with
> Baba by writing her a long heartfelt letter. It
> took weeks to compose,
> telling her about my trip and asking about my
> experience with Muktananda,
> hoping for some communication in return. I was
> clearly asking for help. I
> sent the letter through one of Gurumayi's close
> assistants whom I knew well
> and included a large check. I never heard anything
> from Gurumayi or anyone
> else. My check was cashed."
> A;
> An example of possible Ashram Instructions:
> To all Department Heads - Strictly Confidential -
> Instructions for handling incoming mail:
> 1. Open all mail asap.
> 2. If money in mail - immediately walk money over to
> Finance Office for deposit same day.
> 3. Seperate mail in 2 piles:
>
> A - Bad mail = Asking for answers to problems -
> Burn this mail in the fire at either temple at
> Nataraj statue and ring bell - If very large amount
> of bad mail - Call Bhrahmin Priests - request Yagna
> and chants.
>
> B - Good mail = Praising gurus, especially
> Muktananda and GM - CUt, paste and embellish as much
> as possible and post on SYDA "discussion" Website.
> R;

I think you got it.



> Radha, you are protected and strong. And free!
> Much love,
> Adriana
>
>
>
> Thank-you,Much LOve to you,Radha Free at Last!!!



Post Number 3117

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Tue Feb 4, 2003 2:45 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY]


uhhhh,Nighthawk,or maybe duhhh:)(hope you don't mind
the ribbing) ,Yes, SY is Tantric altho they have
tried to pass it off as right-handed
tantra.(Meditation Revolution re: Douglas Brooks)Baba
was a left-handed Tantrica.He practiced taking energy
from young girls to be able to stimulate his
kundalini,so that he could give shaktipat,so where
does that leave the young girls?It requires a dark or
perverse act to stimulate the shakti of one that is
not fully realized altho, maybe a powerful yogi Mu was
not God realized(Such a one is absorbed in inner
work,and rarely speaks or relates to the gross
plane),it is here where the power is abused. One
should never use power on the gross for personal
gain.ie: to make money off spiritual teachings,to have
sex w/ young girls that have no idea what you are
doing,to gain fame,etc.And the biggest joke is ,sure
it is easy to retain your semen when you can't get it
up. So why on earth did he go around putting his
flacid penis in places he shouldn't have,for what
purpose(he had a purpose ,to take)
These are the things I find incredibly amazing and
amusing since the fog has lifted from my eyes.It is so
absurd,and SY still uses the excuse that it wasn't
sex 'cause he couldn't get it up.And like Howie
said,and pot bellies are great yogic kumbaca(sp?)
Sorry i just can't help it when i gget started on this
stuff. What was I thinking???? ROTFL

LOve, Radha














--- Nighthawk <dorf@jps.net> wrotee:
> It seems to me that rather than SY being a special
> separate part of Hinduism it is just part of Tantra.
> There is shaktipat throughout Tantra apparently. An
> American guru called, I think, Shankaracharya claims
> to be a tantric guru, gives shaktipat and says he
> had a number of tantrik gurus. Among them he lists
> Muktananda. Among the accounts I have read of Baba's
> love making the young women seem to be saying he was
> retaining his semen, a tantric practice. The other
> or, that Baba smoked , seems to relate to
> the special uses of by tantrics to lessen the
> negative effects of weed and get some kind of
> benefit from it. Robert Svoboda's Vimalananda, a
> tantric, talks about this practice at length. From:
> FiestaTwist
> To: dorf@jps.net
> Sent: Tuesday, February 04, 2003 1:52 PM
> Subject: There's only ONE way to copy DVD Movies.
>
>
>
>
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> This message comes to you from FiestaTwist.
> FiestaTwist is designed to bring the best that the
> Internet has to offer directly to you. We hope you
> enjoy the experience, but if you wish not to hear
> from us again, please click the link at the end of
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>

Post Number 3121

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Tue Feb 4, 2003 3:06 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY] Re: Free Expression


Thanks Stuart,This is good,this is precisely the
reason I don't call him Baba anymore. He is MU for
short,and I share my experiences and what I have
learned (IMO).thu much searching as a take it or leave
it. But i can honestly say I don't or love MU,I
played a karmic role because of my own
delusions(karmas),I now play a new role.I could not be
what i am now w/o the other .Nothing worth having
comes easy. Do I want that to happen to anyone else
no,I and others did it,I am healed and I say the
planet is tired of abuse,and this site and others are
a reflection of that.
As Tod Rundgrat said it so well"There enough
destroyers and criticizers ,the world needs a Healer"
LOve Radha













--- "Stuart <sresnick2@attbi.comm>"
<sresnick2@attbi.com> wrote:
> <kalyaniw@h...> wrote:
> > For everyone that s Baba there are a hundred
> who love him.
>
> Maybe. Or (as long as we're making up statistics)
> maybe for every one
> who loves baba there are 37.6 who him. Maybe
> 93.7% of people who
> say they "love Baba" never had any contact with Baba
> outside of a
> public figurehead on a throne, an image in altered
> photos, or a voice
> in edited books. Their "love" is akin to the "love"
> one might have
> for a rock star or movie actor they know only as a
> performer. It's
> more a "love" for one's own ideas or feelings or
> projections than a
> relation with an actual person.
>
> Maybe some of the people who'd say they Baba
> are the same way.
>
> It's not possible to judge or count who loves or
> s or why.
>
> But maybe some people, after so many years of
> placing the guru at the
> center of their lives so intensely, think that their
> only options are
> to love Baba or Baba. They miss the other
> option, which is to
> forget about Baba, who after all is just a long-dead
> swami, & move
> that energy into their day-to-day lives. It's
> absolutely possible to
> look at our entire SYDA experience in terms of what
> (if anything) it
> taught us that we can put to use here & now. In
> doesn't have to be
> about "Baba this..." and "Baba that..."
>
> Stuart
> sresnick2@attbi.com
> http://home.attbi.com/~sresnick2/mypage.htm

Post Number 3132

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Tue Feb 4, 2003 6:28 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY]


In black tantra you need someone to take from, or in
just plain weird stuff, you can stimulate kundalini by
eating fresh brains that pop out of a burning
corpse, touch your tongue to human body organs. Or
molest young women, boys, or children (male or female
works).
He wasn't enough on his own.
LOve ,Radha



---

Post Number 3141


From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Wed Feb 5, 2003 3:55 am
Subject: Re: [eXSY]







Yea,I remember MU also talked about sitting in a
graveyard using a japa mala in the stomach of a
baby. It is some ucky stuff,some just plain weird,some
that really harms others.The quest for powers that are
not divine. Rad







Post Number 3163


From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Wed Feb 5, 2003 10:03 am
Subject: Re: [eXSY]


Hi Adriana,Thanks,glad to oblige :)
Yes Med. Rev. is chock full of rewritten
history,this is one reason all this is so impossible
for them to start, it's like which were lies and which
weren't.

Doug Brooks and all the scholars put theirs reps on
the line for the book. I can't imagine they had an
inkling of the abuse, too much would have been at
stake,but who knows. It is very interesting to go back
and read. Does anybody know what happened to all the
scholars? I have heard they all left, but nothing
certain.

A friend pulled this up for me so I will pass it on:

The exact section in MR that discusses Right-Current
and Left-Current paths and gurus. It's actually from
the Introduction by Douglas Brooks. It's even more
astounding than I remembered--take a look in the
section "Viewing Siddha Yoga From Within The
Categories of Hindu-Inspired Mysticism" (pps.
xxxiv-xxxvii) in Brooks' Introduction. Check it out.

At one point Brooks writes:
"In Right-Current traditions, such as Siddha Yoga, the
guru does not deliberately engage, personally or
privately, in contradictory ideals, values,
principles, concepts, or practices. Further, the guru
is not diffident or disdainful of social
conventions...Right-Current traditions have as one of
their important features the notion that the guru will
not abuse or overstep certain ethical or personal
boundaries in the guru-disciple relationship...Suffice
it to say for now that Siddha Yoga is not a
convention-defying path that eschews the ethical
standards of the world..." (p.xxxii).

Brooks writes about this point in the context of
discussing the guru's state of freedom saying, "Siddha
Yoga is not a Left-Current Path in which the guru
deliberately chooses to enact examples of this state
of freedom by defiance or transgression of social,
cultural, or religious norms...Siddha Yoga is more
correctly associated with the 'Right-Current Paths' "
(xxxiv-xxxv).


Check out footnotes on page 592 (# 34, 35, 36)



LOve Radha






--- Adriana Breidenstein <adriana@jouurneysu.com>
wrote:
> O my O my. I am so glad! You had me ROTFL as well
> Radha. Such clarity and so absurd.
> Now you can tell it as it is. Poof -
>
> Are you saying that Prof. Brooks actually wrote
> about this?
>
> I could never get myself to buy that book - --
> uhuh ---
>
> Maybe yu should send it your part of the next
> edition called: "Stalking and choosing your prey."
> A. assign rooms on same floor as you
> B. have them consider this an honor
> C. send special invitation to be part of small
> chosen goup in next city
> D. get curtains with holes
> E. smack your lips and observe their coming and
> going
>
> I could go on and on but in your honor I will
> refrain.
>
> Thank you for being SO PRESENT.
> Adriana

Post Number 3675

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Sat Feb 15, 2003 6:04 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY] RE: Nityananda Jr.


Dear X, --  I agree with your take of course MU was a
Tantric yogi. Can any of us prove anything no,but when
I put my experience together w/ much I have learned,it
all points that way.As I have stated in earlier
posts,it seems the ones in "that state" of God
realization are not practicing anything. And why
should they,they are there. All Ramakrishna had to do
was think of the Mother and he was in that state.His
disciples had to follow him around to catch him,before
he hit the floor in ecstacy.
Sounds like Nit,Sr.had little use for
practices,people,or anything of this world.
IMO.Mu was a high yogi,but he had to stimulate
the kundalini by using the gross plane,ie,others.This
is where it is definitely not only Tantra,but black
left-handed tantra.He was a left-handed tantrica IMO.
In the Aghora book mentioned several times
here,it speaks of being able to take so much energy
from another,(there are male and female tantricas)
that it can shorten the person lifespan,if the
tantrica really does it right.
Why did MU decide his mission mattered more than
those that were harmed,only God knows.
I believe the world is ready, for finding God
w/o an intermediary,so this will never happen
again,and how can it keep happening if we get the word
out.Then with it as common knowledge it isn't as easy
to weave a spell of illusion.
It is kinda like the recovery movement.When I was
growing up no one knew what alcoholism was,I didn't
realized my Dad had died of complications thereof till
I was in my 30's. When there is information it shines
a light in the darkness.

Okay I'm
through for now,gotta go,LOve to all Radha


X wrote:
> Perhaps Nityananda Jr. is not as guilty as SYDA
> makes him out to be.
> Perhaps he was just emulating and/or copying his own
> guru whom he
> adored. After all, he was so young and
> impressionable. Any thoughts
> on
> this?
>
> Loretta
> Dear Loretta,
> I've been thinking about this lately. The more I
> study with my
> Tantric teacher (who spent a great deal of time with
> Nityananda
> Jr.), the more I learn what was taught in his
> ashram....very
> specific practices to do with the chakras etc.(no
> big secret things
> but, certainly, nothing we were ever permitted to go
> near in
> syda...in the days of Gurumayi...I understand from
> all of you that
> it was very different in Baba's time), the more I am
> beginning to
> wonder about the whole 2 guru succession. I always
> thought, "How
> could Baba have made such a mistake if he was so
> aware" (yes, even
> taking all of the negative stuff into account, I
> don't think anyone
> is denying Baba was a very powerful yogi). So maybe
> putting 2 gurus
> on the throne wasn't a mistake at all. Gurumayi's
> ashram, as it is
> presently structured, is designed to grab as many
> people as possible
> into the fold...keeping them there doesn't seem to
> be a huge
> priority these days. It is most definitely a KARMA
> YOGA ashram. From
> everything I've heard, Nityananda's ashram is not a
> karma yoga
> ashram at all and focuses much more on text recital,
> chanting,
> meditation and jnana yoga. Isn't this the very
> "process" that Sarah
> Caldwell described as a kind of Tantric
> sadhana...moving through the
> stages...from karma to bhakti to jnana? The direct
> links between
> Kashmir Shaivism and Tantric practice
> (authentic...not "neo-Tantra")
> are very well established and I agree with Dr.
> Caldwell's thesis
> that Baba was a Tantric yogi.
> What do you think of this ? Does it seem
> plausable? You knew
> Baba, right? Does this ring a bell with any of you
> "buffalos" out
> there?
> X
>
Post Number 3745 From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Sun Feb 16, 2003 1:52 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY] Re: Nityananda Jr.


--- "loretta108abc <loretta108abbc@yahoo.com>"
<loretta108abc@yahoo.com> wrote:
> --- In eXSY@yahoogroups.com, Radha <radha30327@y...>
> wrote:
> >
> > Dear X, I agree with your take of course MU
> was a
> > Tantric yogi. Can any of us prove anything no,but
> when
> > I put my experience together w/ much I have
> learned,it
> > all points that way.As I have stated in earlier
> > posts,it seems the ones in "that state" of God
> > realization are not practicing anything. And why
> > should they,they are there. All Ramakrishna had to
> do
> > was think of the Mother and he was in that
> state.His
> > disciples had to follow him around to catch
> him,before
> > he hit the floor in ecstacy.
> > Sounds like Nit,Sr.had little use for
> > practices,people,or anything of this world.
> > IMO.Mu was a high yogi,but he had to
> stimulate
> > the kundalini by using the gross
> plane,ie,others.This
> > is where it is definitely not only Tantra,but
> black
> > left-handed tantra.He was a left-handed tantrica
> IMO.
> > In the Aghora book mentioned several times
> > here,it speaks of being able to take so much
> energy
> > from another,(there are male and female tantricas)
> > that it can shorten the person lifespan,if the
> > tantrica really does it right.
> > Why did MU decide his mission mattered more
> than
> > those that were harmed,only God knows.
> > I believe the world is ready, for finding
> God
> > w/o an intermediary,so this will never happen
> > again,and how can it keep happening if we get the
> word
> > out.Then with it as common knowledge it isn't as
> easy
> > to weave a spell of illusion.
> > It is kinda like the recovery movement.When I
> was
> > growing up no one knew what alcoholism was,I
> didn't
> > realized my Dad had died of complications thereof
> till
> > I was in my 30's. When there is information it
> shines
> > a light in the darkness.
> >
> > Okay I'm
> > through for now,gotta go,LOve to all Radha
> >
> Hi Radha,
>
> Do you think Baba "did it right" as you state above.
> After all, if he
> was doing it in order to stimulate the kundalini
> experience and give
> shaktipat which in all effect he did, then I think
> he must have been
> doing it right. Right? I wonder, has anyone ever
> reported that they
> felt depleted afterwards? I have read about this
> also in Taoist
> literature. Sometimes I think that Baba's priority
> was to give
> shaktipat at the expense of everything else.
>
> Loretta
>
> Dear Loretta,
I certainly hope he didn't do it too right or I
won't be here as long as I should be to finish what I
came for,and after all these years of confusion,I am
just beginning to figure that out.
I try to put together just what I was like
after,it is something I try to examine honestly.So
many things are different, in retrospect. I couldn't
wait to get away,it took some real unconscious
manipulation.By that I mean I couldn't let myself
believe I wanted to get away from MU.yet I do remember
wishing in some part of my consicousnes he would
die,so I could leave.
I asked him if I could not go to India the last
time.He told me and my then husband ( my ex-husband we
found out late was sterile later on)to come and get
pregnant and them we could go back. I felt so
trapped,I know it sounds so weird. Why didn't she just
leave,but there was too much going on ,he had a way of
keeping you there.I finally literally told myself I
must be pregnant,and he let us leave,(I found out I
was just about to be put he his house as a
cook.Someone told me that was there till the end when
the s--- really hit the fan)Wonder what I escaped?)We
had to fight the Travel sevite Bruno to get our
passports.He was mad we had gotten year visa's and
were leaving.
Why did Mu have these prioritys? IMO he believed
he lived in the highest state,and that he had a
mission,others be damned. And to give mass
shaktipat,he had to keep stimulating the kundalini(the
older he got the younger the girls) because it didn't
come from the Divine.(Again I have to look at the ones
that seem to be the perfect masters,do they do
practices? Do they need anything? Do they even what a
following? Usually it seems to me thay are the ones
sending peoples away or such.IMO I guess we will all
know someday)What is mass shaktipat anyway?? How many
became enlighted or even followed any path after this
so called awakening.I have heard ors for example of
guys like the Afro Satya Sai Baba,pediphilia,using
human body parts,etc. why one performs a dark act,it
stimulates the kundalini and you can go out and give
Shaktipat to thousands.As I said before,some acts harm
others,some just plain weird.(the eating brains and
such,human that is)
When I was w/ Mu on that table it was an addictive
energy,the love I guess,but in the following
time when I finally left, I plunged back into old
addictions.Alot because I was having headaches that
were constant and I was confused,very confused.When GM
came to my hometown I was in such need and there I was
sucked back in.And thats another story.

Hope this helps,LOve Radha
Anyway hope this helps

Post Number 3746From:

Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Sun Feb 16, 2003 2:06 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY] Ramakrishna


--- "kalyanibai <kalyaniw@hotmaiil.com>"
<kalyaniw@hotmail.com> wrote:
>
>
>
> I always thought Ramakrishna wasn't celibate and
> that he
> participated in tantric practices. Sometimes knowing
> this stuff is
> too unpalatable for the Western digestive system. :}
>
> Regards
> Kalyanibai
>


Dear Kaliyanibai,this is a re-post I wrote
earlier,hope this helps:


Yes, is correct.The article does say this about
Ramakrishna,which I have never heard till Sarah's
article either.(Dunno)But In the "gosple of RK", it is
told at length that RK did the tantric path w/ a
female tantrica. One of his things was to test the
validity of all paths. Yes ,he was already a realized
being supposedly when he did this(eguality)and it is
not lied about.He also said after that this path was
powerful,true,and to dangerous for anyone in kali
yuga.
love rad

Post Number 4863

From: "loretta108abc" <loretta108abc@yahoo.com>
Date: Fri Mar 14, 2003 2:15 pm
Subject: Re: Thanks for your reactions and comments; Nityananda


--- In eXSY@yahoogroups.com, "shrippitch" <Pitchboy@l...> wrote:
> Thank you all for your comments and reactions! I've read your story
> now, Radha; it is very good to finally have someone who says: "Baba
> did this to ME" and signs her name under it. This is courageous.
> Swami Vasudevanand once told me he had NEVER met a person who
> said "Baba did it to ME". Now we have one, thank you!


Janaki also said it.

L

Post Number 4868

From: "loretta108abc" <loretta108abc@yahoo.com>
Date: Fri Mar 14, 2003 2:26 pm
Subject: Re: Thanks for your reactions and comments; Nityananda


> >>Swami Vasudevanand once told me he had NEVER met a person ...<<
>
> >>Janaki also said it.<<

--- In eXSY@yahoogroups.com, "Hominnid X" <hominid1055@y...> wrote:
<<Maybe he's never met her - or perhaps faithfully never read the
articles.

This brings up the question: where is she at these days? I
remember her. I knew someone who was very close to her. This person had
been to other spiritual teachers and ashrams before, and was really
freaked out about what was going on in the Ashram and around Baba.
One of these things was JV looking into her eyes and saying "you
know, you can never leave siddha yoga". >>


Loretta wrote:
I believe she's living in her native Holland. When Sarah Caldwell
interviewed her for her essay, that is where the interview took place
(via telephone).

L

Post Number 4881

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Fri Mar 14, 2003 3:09 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY] Re: Thanks for your reactions and comments; Nityananda


I will just say here for many years I viewed my
molestation as a positive (confusing) experience
because there was simply no other way to cope w/it.
When you read, I think it is in LSY articles, or maybe
it is Caldwell's article, what she (Janaki) endured as a child
w/the Guru. Her mother made her live w/(degrading
constant sexual abuse). I could see why she might view
her experience w/Mu differently. But the way I see it
it was pretty awful that that situation was taken
advantage of. I bet if you could talk to all the women
that this happened to you would find a pattern of very
disfunctional upbringing, and very poor boundaries. Mine
sure was.\

The cold hard facts are, Mu was the Guru, the
authority figure, and the imbalance of power can only
be abuse. IMO. Denial, brainwashing, the stockholm
syndrome. You can find the reasons for not seeing
Truth and living in illusions, it is protection.

LOve Radha

Post Number 4986

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Tue Mar 18, 2003 11:20 am
Subject: My Letter and a Response


Dear List,
Below I want to share with you the latest phase in my
story. As you all know I sent a letter to the foundation along w/ "MY
Story", hoping for some resolution for SY coming clean . I sent this to
Lester because not only is he the CEO, but we are acquainted. I have helped on
projects where I live when the Directors came and Lester MC'd a reunion I
worked on years back, so there is a connection. I preface this way so that you
may get a feel for exactly what is happening here.

As you will see my letter content was not addressed,
nor was any feeling given to my situation. It is impersonal and legally
correct. The only mention of money I offered anywhere was in "MY Story",
the fact that the check I sent GM, which was cashed, but the questions
and my asking for SY's help in the accompanying letter, in regard to my
sexual abuse by Muk, was left unanswered and not addressed - silence yet again.

I am so grateful to be out of there, and only too well
understand the fear and denial from which this letter was composed.

In Lester's first paragraph, he says, "Thank you for
your letter and for informing us about your posting on the internet. I
appreciate your consideration in this way as it helps us be sensitive
and responsive to how people may be feeling in light of the information you
posted."

I tried for years to open communication with SYDA in
regard to being sexually abused by Muk. I even wrote letters and they
were not "sensitive and responsive" to how I was feeling. There have been
numerous reports of people trying to open up discussion on these topics,
only to be 'handled' by SY swamis or PR people, in the end, having their
thoughts and feelings shut down in regard to their questions asked and thoughts
and feelings being aired.

In the second paragraph of the letter Lester says, "We
are looking into the allegations you make based on your experiences."

For over twenty years this has been "looked into" and
they still try to hide behind such an excuse. Swamis have left SY over their
discovering such truths about Muk and SY, articles have been
written and published about SY and its abuses.

In closing, I want to say,I have great compassion for
those still in SY, I have dear friends in SY. It is the hardest thing any
of us ever did, to finally "get it" and leave SY. I understand
the level of denial and inability to see the Truth. It is self
preservation and it makes people act in ways they would otherwise deem very
inappropiate. I have been there, I know the conflict, I know the confusion. And
I know we will be there for anyone who needs to heal. New members pop up
every day on this site.

Below, I attach in full, my letter to Lester Strong,
CEO of SYDA, and his subsequent response to me.

Many Blessings to us all. May we know the TRUTH
always.

Love Radha
_________




Dear Lester,
I know you have been keeping up with the recent
changes that I have been going through since I have understood my sexual
experience with Muktananda. I have found that it is very important for the
healing of those of us that have been through this, to not only talk about it
after being silenced for so long, but to be able to acknowledge what it truly
was. Since Siddha Yoga has denied the facts about Muktananda and his sexual
behavior, we have been left on our own to find ways to heal.
It is time for the public silence and isolation for those of us who were
so affected by these encounters to end.

There needs to be a place for the many young girls and women who were harmed
in this way, to process this event and begin to be able to move on with
their lives. There needs to be a way for everyone in Siddha Yoga to
genuinely acknowledge and process these events.

It is truly amazing, as I have now discovered that I have friends
here in Atlanta that now say anything to discredit me, so that they do not have to believe this happened, but this cannot change the fact that it did. Now
with the details of what happened being told, it will be clear that power was
abused.

Since I first posted my story on-line, my story has been cut, pasted and
sent, without my knowledge or permission, to the SYDA Foundation. I am
sending you my latest post from the ex-siddha yoga e-mail group, so that not
only will you know what I have chosen to once again reveal, but so that you
will understand that I do this from a place of compassion for myself and
others. And, so that you, too, know first hand from me, the details.

I am so grateful to finally have the ability to be able to acknowledge
this, talk about this, and begin to move forward in my journey.
I am ready to listen to and help those that were also so affected by these
affairs, as I was; this is one huge reason for revealing what I have
experienced. It is long overdue, in being time for the acknowledgement
of these affairs, the processing of them, and for the healing to begin. I
take these first steps in good faith for myself, and for all that may come
to join me.
With Love and Respect ,
Radha







Begin quoted material:

SYDA FOUNDATION

February 25, 2003

Joan R Bridges
XXXXX
XXXXX


Dear Radha,

Thank you for your letter and for informing us about
your posting on the internet. I appreciate your consideration in this way
as it helps us be sensitive and responsive to how people may be feeling
in light of the information you posted.

We are looking into the allegations you made based on
your experiences. For now, I'd like to take this opportunity to express some
thoughts I have in response to what you have said about recent events.

Based upon your comments in the posting, I understand
that you may have regretted your decision to make a contribution to the
SYDA Foundation. Consequently, I would like to acknowledge and honor
your feelings by returning your recorded donations for 2002. Enclosed
please find a check in the amount of $2,000.00. This amount reflects our
understanding of what you have contributed over the last year. We do not want
to accept money if there is any reluctance or regret on the part of the
giver.

On another point, I am sensing that perhaps you may
have been upset when you heard about Dana Prichard going to Atlanta without
much advance notice, because your wish for privacy and sensitivity in this
matter. I wanted you to know that, based upon what Shrikari Spache had surmised from her conversation with you, I thought you were open to speaking with Dana. It is important to me that you know that my intention for sending Dana was to truly listen to what you had to say so that the Foundation could respond in the most appropriate way. It was never my intention to stop you from expressing yourself.

I do appreciate your willingness to share your concerns honestly as it
allows me the opportunity to hear your perspective and share my thoughts
with you.


With Respect,

Lester F Strong
Chief Executive Office
SYDA Foundation

Post Number 4998

From: Radha <radha30327@yahoo.com>
Date: Tue Mar 18, 2003 4:54 pm
Subject: Re: [eXSY] Re: My Letter and a Response


--- adrianabreidenstein <adriana@jourrneysu.com> wrote:
> -
> Dear Radha -
>
> Thank you for sharing this letter with us. I feel
> personally that it
> could have been me and it's one of those "Customer
> Relations"
> deparment letters that most companies sent out after
> a complaint.
> It almost appears like the $ 2,000.00 is a
> settlement {paid with your
> own money]:) and then the grandiose statement to
> their lilly
> whiteness morals. Quote - "we certainly would never
> want to accept
> this money if there was any doubt bla blah." Such
> high morals -
>
rad:
yes it is funny isn't it,2000.00,which represented my
2002 dakshina ,which i canceled early that year,cause
I had finally made it thru the carwash;)
I figure now we can all write for all we spent in
SY. I mean I never knew we had a money back guarantee
;) And frankly I am sick of paying for sexual
predators.


A;
So, we know that Lester knows. We know that a lot
> lot of other people
> know and that the letter was written "in committee."
> I have a feeling that you would not have even gotten
> this far if GM
> had been in Fallsburg!
>
Rad;
Yes most likely true.


A:
A distinct feeling. Where is Shrikari Spache? I did
> seva with her in
> the Dakshina office. I wonder what she was told.
>
Rad; Shrikari is in S.F. I don't know how much she
knows,I did speak to her at the beginning,when they
were out to do damage control.As I think I said in my
second story post. She only asked If I would speak to
Dana,never told me she was on the way. I didn't know
Dana from Adam. It seems that Lester sounded
conflicted about the whole mess,but this was all he
could say.I have to say I do feel compassion,AND I
will do all in my power to make sure this abuse
stops,there has to come a time when they see the
Truth,that the entire organization and Guru's are
based on lies.

A:

> How laugable to defend sending this woman to Atlanta
> to speak with
> you and you "refusing" her.
> So childish - so underhanded. You never got a notice
> or timeframe and
> would have been glad to sit down with her had it all
> been above the
> table. Who is this woman they sent?
>
Rad;
Shrikari had to know the whole plan,here is
conflict again.I could tell something was amiss in her
voice that day,but didn't know what.It is the sad
state of conflict that arises from believing you are
serving Truth,but you are not.No wonder they keep
themselves in the foot. It would have been better
in both cases to do nothing than what they did.
Oh Dana was the new USA regional person,(Pr or what??)

A:
Too funny you aborted their ill-conceived mission.
> I don't know, I am not sure how much compassion and
> understanding I
> have for them. It's corporate America squared.
>
Rad;
I have to remember my own delusion(it might have
been me at one time),this gives me the
gratitude(FREEEE) to have compassion. Once again
having compassion to me doesn't mean "Arjuna doesn't
shoot his arrows"

A;

As for the Atlanta community. I experience the same
> here in Houston.
> Silence,denial, remarks directed at me that I hear
> about.
> In that respect - let them eat cake. They are the
> unfortunate ones.
>
Rad;
I know i have never felt this good about
myself,Iagree ,that is not worth worry about. And yet
I am so ready and happy to talk to someone,whenthey
are struggling and ready to get out.I will give all I
can to help them.


A;
Yes, I am starting to believe that SY was a great
> Karmic Carwash.
> Imagine being stuck in the carwash :}
> We get to dry up our vehicles and go on in shining
> armor.
> Much love and once again - herein lies our humanity.
> To touch and to
> heal.
> Adriana
>
>
> Rad; So beautifully said as always Adriana,I love to
read your posts. Thanks.Much love to you,Radha

 

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